13 March, 2018

I Am Broken
I am broken.
I am hurt.
They broke me like glass.
I fell like sand through an hour glass.
But I turned my life around.
And here I am now.
This is me

Have you ever had the misfortune of being bullied?  If yes, you will understand those words the most.  Yet there will be those who did not survive the bullies, yes, they took their own lives, there are those who will live with the scars for life.  And there are others who have managed to claw their way through the hurt and come out smiling at the other side.

For those who have never experienced being bullied this is what it does.

It is a slow erosion of self-esteem, it is looking at yourself in the mirror and believing you are what the bully/bullies claim you to be.  Eventually you see yourself exactly as that person/s sees you.  Why you may ask.  Words cut deep, they are there in your mind, they infiltrate your sleep, to such an extent you will not know the truth of who you are any longer.

Let me tell you the story of a young teen who today is 14 years old.

She was confident, intelligent, loving, kind and in general well balanced.

The parents thought they were doing good, and yes, they were on one level.  They put her in a private school, well one would expect that in these institutions those in charge have a handle on what is happening right under their very noses.  How wrong this thought pattern was.

Not long into the very 1st term at school, the child was punched in the face.  The mother went in told the child if she ever were to lift her hand to her child again, she would rue the day she was born – not the best way to handle the situation but the instinct of the mother kicked in and she had to protect her child.

The parents made an appointment to see the head of the primary school, what a shock to their system when the mother was told what she had done was illegal.  Perhaps so, but then bullying in schools is also illegal – unfortunately nothing was done, and no stricter measures were put in place. This young bully did leave the school at the end of that year.

Sigh of relief from the parents.  This was short-lived unfortunately.  The true bullying started off slowly and overtime the young child who was confident became less and less sure of herself.  It eventually became so bad that she made herself not achieve – reason being she was told she is a nerd for getting good grades

She started looking sloppy no matter what was said by her parents, she just did not care.  The reason eventually did come out – she was told she is ugly, she is worthless, she is useless at everything.

The mother went back to school, and most disturbing of all was the mother was told it is up to her as a parent to instil self-confidence in her child.  This is of course a given for any mother and father who have the best interest of their child at heart.

Eventually the parents decided that they would move their child.  Even though there remain issues and they will eventually begin to fade, the child is once again soaring.  This young woman once again stands proud, is more self-assured and confident enough to stand up for herself.  She has learnt an invaluable lesson though.  Kindness costs nothing.  Words hurt and demean.  Words can literally kill.

To you the parents out there reading this post.

Never allow your child to be bullied.
Never say you are not interested.
Never allow your child to fight against a system which will harm them in the long run.
Never allow so called friends to intimidate your child.
Bullies become abusers.  They use their nasty tactics to feel good about themselves.

Teach your children well – bullies and abusers are not acceptable.

~Life Coach With T~